Having recently been quoted on SFGate, we got to browsing around the site and came across this post, 100 Pet Peeves of Servers Part Deux, and started reading down the list, and thought about joining the thread on SFGate, but why? We have our own blog and can say what we want here. So here goes (for the patrons)…

2. Diners (a couple or two friends) who are both on their cell phones at the same time. Didn’t you guys go out to spend time together?

Agreed, that’s annoying and we think unless your house is on fire, your children have lost a limb thanks to the babysitter, or Gandhi is knocking on your door and you’re not home, you should turn the f*cking thing off.

4. Asking our recommendation then saying ‘so you’ve tried it?’ Of course I’ve tried it if I just described it as something I enjoy.

We’d be willing to bet AT LEAST 70% of waitstaff have not only NOT tried a main dish or something on the menu, but couldn’t tell you if it’s cooked in olive oil or butter, and will tell you whatever you want to hear, just to get you to move along. Don’t be surprised if that steak you just ordered was recommended by your vegetarian server.

10. Baby strollers.

Harden the F*ck up. People have children. Get used to it.

15. When you are carrying a billion things and a table flags you down and asks for something.

If you’re in a quality restaurant you shouldn’t be carrying a billion things, because we don’t want your arm hair in our plate, and chances are REALLY good that if it’s gotten to the point you need to be flagged down, perhaps you’re not doing your job.

25. Blaming traffic, weather, parking, etc. for being late for a reservation then demanding you be seated. Late is late, own it, apologize, and ask what might be done.

Bravo! Well said. You’re late, kindly step to the back of the line.

29. When I go up to a table to greet them and say “How is everyone doing this evening?” And they all silently stare at me like I am speaking a foreign language

Maybe you are. We have visitors in this fine city from all around the world. All you have to do is TALK LOUDER and they’ll understand.

30. Huge exaggerations to make a point. Example; “We have waited over half an hour for this table to be cleaned”. “Oh really, because that’s unacceptable. I will go to that busser right now and have him fired for this incredible transgression.” “Oh, don’t do that. It was more like 10 minutes”. Ditto on Yelp reviews.

Or…you could clean it right away. Problem solved, and probably what should have happened in the first place.

41. If planning to sit down at a table, before ordering at the bar, check to see if there is a server or a cocktailer waiting on those tables. When customers sit down at a table in my section, but order with the bar, I lose that entire table. On busy nights that means my entire section is often taken away.

Perhaps you should tell your bartender to recommend those people order through you, or offer to split the tip with the bartender if you help keep them happy.

47. Tables that do not acknowledge the server after they greet the table. That’s just common courtesy, although judging appropriate times to approach the table is also key.

Put a fork through the top of one of their hands. Works every time.

Clearly we joke with you all on some of these, but clearly many of you servers never before had a large platform to vent what it is that eats away at you every time you get to work. It sounds to us like a lot of bitchin’ and moanin’ for doing a job that you should all be happy to have. Just remember, somebody did your job before you, and when you leave, somebody will do it after you. You are disposable and the customer is always right. Keep your job. It’s a good one. It pays, and you have freedom. That’s our two cents.

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