Lolspeak step aside, “Realspeak” is here to stay!

It’s been around for a while, and seems to be creeping in more often, so we’re now officially declaring Realspeak a new language.

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Huge reduced! Elegant column front gate & stepping stones lead to this gorgeous&quality rmdled Merced Manor hme. Hugh Gourmet chefʼs ktchn w/island,hi-end stnless steel applnces,granite cntr,chrry cbnts & blt-in wineculr.3bd/2.5ba upstairs w/jaccz & shwr. Downstairs hugh&bright fmly rm w/deck plus 2br/2ba&lndry rm. All 5 br are M suites,2 jaccz. All nu windws,2 S/S pkg grages. Near great schools,Stonestown Galleria,YMCA,MUNI,EZ access to Freeway. This great detched home almost has it all!

We literally cut and pasted those marketing remarks directly from the listing. Not one editor’s change has been made.

-485 Eucalyptus Dr. [listing detail]

11 Comments

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  1. Ww! That plce rlly is Hugh!

  2. I think it is the SMS style

  3. What’s the point with the abbreviations? Does MLS charge by the character, or are the people writing these entries just hold overs from the newspaper days?

  4. No, this is just a retarded realtor that ought to be fired.

    [Editor’s note: That would be “rtrd rltr ot 2 b frd”…doncha no?]

  5. i luv “almost has it all”. not “haz it all”, but almost.

  6. I think the realtor is targeting the teen OMG texting crowd. But I am not sure why. Perhaps the kid can convince the parents to buy this place.

  7. Come to SF. Half the 25-35 year old home buyers are getting help from bank of mom and dad :)

    SF is great for this.

  8. this has me laughing my ass off. I wish I had a dollar for every random missing vowel, miserably mis-spelled, obfuscated syntax riddled ad I’ve waded through. I could actually afford any house (or “hse”) that I wanted.

    Thanks for the blog inspiration too!

  9. I haz a hugh hs 4 sal in da sunset. It haz grt vus and jus steps frum da ozean!

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